Ellana wanted me to find a positive in a bad situation and, in a neat bit of serendipity, the perfect example has arisen. Must be fate. Or something.
So, for anyone who doesn't already know, I have a severe mental illness and had a breakdown just over four years ago. When it happened, my whole world literally imploded. I stopped going out, relied on others for everything. Through therapy and hard work I am much better than I was. But when I was first ill, I lost friends. They didn't know what to say or do, didn't know how to support me, couldn't see that I was still me, were scared of my illness. And they drifted away.
I learnt, very quickly, who my true friends were. And I don't miss any of the people who left me when I needed them because it turned out I didn't need them after all.
So now, four years on, where am I?
Well, I'm still making progress, Therapy is hard work but nobody said it would be easy. As a single parent things can be tough. If I don't do things then they don't get done so a duvet day is out of the question. But there is a glimmer of hope on the horizon, I am eligible for some respite care at a retreat in the next town. Yippee.
But now I find I am losing friends again, but this time people who don't want me to get better. People who are trying to hold me back. People who think I shouldn't go to respite. People who think I can't go to respite. And this time I know this is not a negative thing, I will keep all my lovely positive friends around me and shed the ones who don't want me to get better like a snake sheds it's skin.
So out of the negative (breakdown) came a positive (stronger friendships) and so it will be again as out of the positive (recovery) comes a negative (loss) and anther positive (stronger friendships).
"After the rain comes sun, after the sun comes rain again"
Life is full of positives and negatives and with the right PMA (Positive Mental Attitude) you can turn any negative into a positive.......just be careful you don't do the reverse.
Thanks Ellana for letting me write this, and thanks to you all for reading.
I am, as always,
Jenasaurus